Help!

Hey can someone sign me up for one of those makeover shows were people come in and clean up all the shit in your apartment?

I don't want to clean. It's really bad.

I'm thinking about it now, and in about a year we have done nothing about organizing and putting shit away. It hurts my head to think about how we can make the computer room (tonight's room too be cleaned) not look like a bomb exploded.

How can one get a maid to put everything away and clean it without the stranger actually touching your shit? Hrmmm.

Side note: in the bathroom today at work there was free sample smelly rock hand soap. I used it and now my hands smell like grapefruit and skunk. I want to wretch.